October 2009 Archives

Hey Lets Bitch About SEO Again

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Hey I have an awesome idea. Let's take a field of business that many people work in to make a legitimate living, and tear it down for being immoral and accuse it of fraud.  And when it comes to solving the actual problem that this business works on, apply a nice helping of sunshine-up-your-ass, and everything's just fine.

Better yet, let's do this every six to eight months, because collectively we have the attention span of a fruit fly.

Well, it's been a solid eight months, and somebody kicked the hornet's nest. Is SEO good or evil?  It's good. It's great. I <3 SEO.

When you hire a legitimate white hat SEO, you are paying for domain knowledge. Is it better to use dashes or underscores to separate keywords in a URL? I know the answer, but I've spent some time researching SEO. If I were, say, an online publisher, it would be worth money to hire somebody who knows the answer to this question and a pop-quiz full of other questions that isn't in your average web developer's job description.

Every hit on SEO eventually ends with the same solution. "Just write good content or make a good web app, and the traffic will come."  Oh really, it's just that simple, eh? How many unpublished novelists are there out there? How many film students whose reels go unwatched? Google is the greatest media distribution channel that there has ever been, and you expect people not to look for every advantage they can get?

Here's the failure with the "make a good app, people will come" argument. Let's say you are making an application whose target market is one person in ten. That's a respectably sized market.  You tell your friends, your family, people you know through the internet. You write on your personal blog about it.  Let's say you reach 1,000 people, generously.  If your hit rate within that market is 50%, that's 50 people you've got who haven't immediately dumped your app. Do they care enough about it to do your marketing for you?  With that small of a user base, you don't have statistically significant feedback to improve the site, you've got to gun it on intuition, which is frequently wrong.

So there you are, with your 50 users, and since you don't have to spend any time or money on distributing your app (remember these 50 people will do it for you), then you can continue to develop the app, making it "better", as you see it, in a vacuum.  

And let's just count on those 50 people bringing in 10 million of their closest friends in the next month or so.

Hell no. This is the internet, son. Kill or be killed.  If you can spend some money on a good SEO who will bring a steady flow of traffic to your site, then you have a way better chance than with that initial set of 50.  With search engine traffic, even if you're only getting a handful of traffic every day, it's a different handful.  If you have built something of value, some percentage of users will recognize this, and maybe tell a friend, maybe they'll come back to your site, and maybe they'll link to you, but you have a continuous stream of people to try it out on.

Obviously there are shysters in SEO.  Going to an SEO who guarantees that you'll rank in the top 10 for mesothelioma is like taking your car to the dealership to get fixed. Of course you're going to get scammed. Buyer beware, and all that.

Anyway, keep debating on whether or not SEO is evil. The rest of us have to find ways to handle our traffic growth.

I Don't Code in my Free Time

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Why would you ever hire a programmer who doesn't program in his free time?  I mean, a person who doesn't compile recreationally is probably useless on the job.  You might as well hire somebody ... old. And who wants a bunch of people around the office who whine about things like healthcare benefits? Just don't get sick, duh.

I love it when twenty-something engineers take such a hard-line position on something they have so little experience with, like hiring.  Saying that you wouldn't hire somebody for a programming job because they don't program in their spare time is blissfully naive. Yeah, I remember the days when my greatest responsibility to another human being was making rent on the first of the month.

If I am going to hire somebody for a programming job, I don't really give a shit what they do in their spare time, so long as that person is very good at the task at hand.  I don't ask questions about what a person does in their free time in job interviews because I don't care, and because that can sometimes open the door to an illegal conversation. (What's that? There are laws about what you can ask somebody in a job interview? Who thought that up, Republicans?)

Me, I can count on one hand the number of times I've programmed outside of work or a class.  There was only once when I actually enjoyed it, though. I was in college, and shared a common wall with a girl from Spain who was painfully unaware that her computer had a volume control knob. She would stay up late on AOL instant messenger, and I couldn't sleep.  So, I rigged up a Python script to play AOL instant messenger sounds randomly every 5 to 10 seconds, turned up my speakers, pointed them at the wall, and went on vacation for a week.  And thus, the asshole you all know and love is born.

I don't enjoy programming so much as I enjoy the satisfaction I get from cracking hard problems. In that case, computer code is a means to an end, but so is my Craftsman socket set.  I like to spend free time wrenching on a car or a bike, but I don't set out on Saturday morning and say "I'm going to learn how to use a torque wrench today, because those things are the future of tools".  

I would not want to work for a company that wouldn't hire me because I don't code in my spare time. Professional development? Working at a startup, I get a heaping helping of that on the job.  Keeping up with new technology? Yeah, I read reddit, and again, startup.  You know what's more awesome than spending my Saturday afternoon learning Haskell by hacking away at a few Project Euler problems? Fuck, ANYTHING.

Really, why should I bother spending time with my family and taking an active role in my kids' development when there's a dead-beaten math puzzle that doesn't have a good answer in Clojure?  "I won't hire someone who doesn't code in their free time" is Siliconvallese for "I don't want to hire any grownups because they remind me of my parents".